Me, In My Dreams
“When I grow up, I want to be an Olympic figure skater,” I declared, not a drop of doubt or self-consciousness clouding my voice.
While I prefer to leave much of my childhood in the past, I would love to recapture the self-confidence and singularity of purpose I had as a young girl in 1976 when the Winter Olympics in Innsbruck, Austria brought me my first clear vision of the future and my first girl crush.
Dorothy Hamill was everything to me that year; my hero in every sense of the word. If Al Gore had already invented the internet, I would have qualified as a celebrity stalker. As it was, I scoured magazines and newspapers for photos, articles and tidbits about Dorothy, on every aspect of her life, neatly pressing each into a cloth-covered scrapbook.
I wanted to be Dorothy Hamill; to embody everything about her – her talent, grace, stamina and determination. Her sassy haircut.
I daydreamed and strategized, envisioning myself gliding confidently across the ice, hair glistening, spinning and jumping with perfected ease, soaking in the adoration of a cheering crowd.
Success was never a question in my mind. I would succeed. Self-doubt crept in to my psyche at some point in my life because I have it in spades as an adult, but in 1976, I would describe my goal and my self-designed, well-researched plan for success to anyone who’d listen.
Step One: The Lessons
My mom humored my infatuation throughout 1976 and drove me twice weekly, 30 minutes each way, to the nearest ice rink for figure skating lessons. I soared when I skated, at least in my mind, dancing, frolicking, willing my body to jump and glide on the ice. To me, I embodied the ideal blend of athleticism from countless gymnastics classes and grace from ongoing ballet lessons. The fact that I could barely skate backward without cracking my head on the ice did little to deter me. The Olympics were calling my name, and I was eager to answer.
Step Two: The Haircut
After weeks of begging my mom for a trip to her hair stylist, I arrived at the salon (“beauty shop” in 1976 vernacular) with my scrapbook of Dorothy photos and my long dark brown curls, neatly pulled back in a ponytail reaching halfway down my back. I left said salon with a short, frizzy do reminiscent of a battered Q-tip. I dreamed of swingy, glossy locks and mourned my signature curls, heartbroken yet convinced of the soundness of my plan.
Ms. Hamill’s Signature “Do”
Step Three: The Shampoo
Certain the only thing keeping me from Dorothy Hamill’s golden existence was the right hair product, I persuaded my mom to buy out the Short & Sassy shampoo and conditioner section of our local drugstore. Though neither made a difference on my fuzzy head, I felt closer to Dorothy knowing we both used the same shampoo.
Step Four: The Diet
In my research of all things Dorothy, I discovered she maintained a rigorous diet of healthy foods, fruits and vegetables and generous servings of chocolate ice cream. I demanded the same. Dorothy had a sweet tooth; I had a sweet tooth – Kismet!
Step Five: The Discipline
I’d read that Dorothy rose at 5:00 am daily to practice on a nearby outdoor ice rink. Inspired by her discipline and bolstered by serendipity – we lived down the block from an outdoor pond covered in ice! – I committed myself to daily practice, skating my little heart out. Though in reality I likely made this sacrifice all of twice, in my head I was a dedicated skater.
The Reality
While my five-step plan did not deliver the promised results, I feel enduring fondness for myself as a little girl and for the heady time I spent in Dorothy Hamill’s shadow.
With both of my children in school and questions about the next phase of my career foremost in my mind, I long for a taste of the self-confidence and determination I had in abundance as a little girl. Perhaps it’s time for another girl crush …
Beautifully written! Laughing at the thought of your curly locks somehow behaving like Dorothy’s straight hair. No go. Although, you DO have beautiful, shiny, healthy hair!!!!! Glad to see you writing.
Thanks, love. Had fun writing it! I’ll dig out a pic of the ole Dot Do sometime to show you – scary!!! xoxoxo
No. No, the wedge was not a good look on either of us. BUT you for got to add the part where mom made the red skating dress!!
You’re right!! I forgot! Mom made a copy of Dorothy’s Olympics skating costume! I wonder what ever happened to it? How was it that your haircut looked better than mine when your hair is curlier?
I had the haircut. I took skating lessons. O ate lots of chocolate ice cream! Just like you AND her! I knew we were meant to be friends!
I can’t tell you how happy that makes me!! I wish I had known you then!
My sister had the haircut, and it kind of looked like it did on Dorothy Hamill. Kind of.
I’m jealous! My sister had the cut too. Her hair is even curlier than mine and we looked ridiculous together. She may have looked worse
.
Completely awful. Having flashbacks. Thank god hair grows back!
I wanted to be Nancy Kerrigan. As a matter of fact, for awhile there when I was younger I was pretty sure that I was Nancy Kerrigan. I took figure skating lessons, and read everything I could about her. I remember the night she skated at the olympics I begged my parents to let me stay up late to watch her routine, and they did (they were pretty tolerant of my obsession). About ten years post-obsession I actually met her by accident going through security at an airport. It was my dream realized, all those years later.
Nancy Kerrigan was awesome!! How cool to run into her! I would have given my left foot to meet Dorothy back then. I’m content now to read her website and watch the video footage from the 1976 Olympics (although it looks so old I couldn’t possibly have been alive back then!). Thanks for commenting!
Oh I love this! Every girl in my fourth-grade class had the haircut, yours truly included (looked terrible). I knew I would break my neck if I tried to skate, but that didn’t dim my girl-crush one bit. Love the content here, but also the structure (if only The Reality could hold off a little longer).
Ah, the Dorothy days… so happy I’m not alone on my girl crush! As another reader mentioned, I wish I would have bottled up a fraction of my youthful determination and grit and could uncork it today!
You couldn’t have had a better girl-crush! Dorothy is an awesome athlete and was a terrific representative for the US in 1976! My girl crush was Michelle Kwan — and it led to me taking up figure skating at 27 and skating on an adult synchronized skating team for about 5 years. And to teaching Learn to Skate to tots. I loved this!!!
That is soooo awesome! I don’t know what synchronized skating is exactly but you are an inspiration. Do you still teach Learn to Skate? So cool! You can be my new girl crush!
I loved dorothy too and had the hair cut as well. i never followed thru to actual skating, i think i wanted only to be a short and sassy spectator.
I’m not sure you could call what I did back then “actual skating!” Short and sassy spectator is a perfect phrase!
Aww, some dreams never lose their luster. I too can remember wanting to be in the Olympics, though my sport (that I never took very seriously) was gymnastics. The short and sassy cut just doesn’t work on us curly heads, although girls these days are lucky enough to have hair irons!
Hair irons are a god send! As are all hair products – I had to live with the frizz back then and it truly wasn’t a good look for me! Once my skating dreams were dashed, I took up gymnastics also – Nadia was it for me for a good long while! Any ideas for a current girl crush?
I mostly skate on my tush when I attempt it, but I can so relate to that passion and determination we had as kids. Damn, if we could bottle, I’d drink a few today. I’m embarrassed today my girl crush was Madonna, ala Borderline/Lucky Stars days. She didn’t have the grit and determination of a Dorothy Hammil, but she sure was sassy.
I’ll take sassy any day! Who didn’t crush on Madonna back in the day?! I need a new girl crush – any ideas?
Excellent!!! Love the writing and the visuals. I need a girl crush too. So well done.
Super post! I love the writing especially that battered q tip. I think the ending fits well and is easy to relate to.
I know it’s hard to believe but battered Q-tip is not a good look for me. I’d show you a pic but it would burn your retinas.
Hahah how cute! I want a pic of you with the hair
Beware – it might burn your eyeballs!
I’d have to say that the most obvious girl crush right now would be Michelle Obama. I just love her. I want her as my friend. She seems so “grounded” and real, in a position where it’s hard to pull that off. She seems like a lot of fun too. I saw her on a talk show where she showed video of being at the Olympics and at a party in the ambassador’s backyard. During a game, she darted under an open parachute and the Secret Service guys were like “Where’d she go?” With her big laugh she said “I’m a bit of a trial for my Secret Service guys.” If you are looking for a worthy crush, she would be my recommendation.
I could easily crush on Michelle Obama! I loved her speech at the Democratic National Convention and adore the playfulness you describe in your comment. She might even have a positive impact on my fashion sense (or lack there of). All around, a wonderful suggestion!
I’m with you. I could use a dose of my youthful determination myself! Love the post.
Thank you! If you find a source for youthful determination, you’ll let me know, right?
You would think it would be having kids. Not so.
Why is it that we adore women who’s hair does things that ours wont do?
I would have worshiped her as well if we’d had ice in Texas in the 70′s. Or a tv…..
Good question! I’ve always coveted sleek, straight, frizz-free hair … just to torment myself. I’ll be jealous of your no ice in TX come winter time here in Chicago! Prepare for a visitor! Thanks for commenting!
LOL! Oh, the hair! I love the battered q-tip line. And I so hear you on the self confidence thing. When I was younger I was going to be [insert obsession of the month here] when I grew up. Of course I was. How could I not? And now I look at changes I want to make in my life and the thought, “I could never do that” crosses my mind way too often. When did that start? Can I get any of that self confidence back or is it just gone forever? Sigh. Nice post.
“I could never do that” comes up way too often – I hear you! If/when you find that old self confidence, please let me know! I’ll do anything for it (except give up my de-frizz hair products!).
I am jealous of your determination and conviction, too. In sixth grade I remember watching the Winter Olympics and realizing with despair and sadness that even by that age I was far too old to start training to be a figure skater. I can’t ever remember I time when I was convinced of success in that way. I think you’re better off being able to remember it, even if you don’t have it now. Thanks for sharing – I loved imagining you getting up at 5 am to go to that pond, all of twice.
“Far too old” – I get it. Though in reality I’m far too old for many things, I have that voice in my head about too many things right now. I’d like to send that voice on a long ass vacation!
A battered Q-tip. I love that. Sweet, nostalgic post. I enjoyed your humor. I love that you were dedicated in your head.
Thank you! I’d even take some pretend dedication right about now! I’m okay with denial! Thanks for commenting!
Oh wow, Dorothy! Who didn’t have a crush on her? That Hamil-camel. So many people had the “do.” Not me, too wavy. Plus, I couldn’t skate two steps backwards. But she was still my hero. Michelle Obama is for sure the obvious one for today. This was so enjoyable! I think we’d all risk retina burns to see your q-tip look.
I wish I’d had your good sense back then – my hair was too curly/wavy also, but I didn’t let that stop me! I’d forgotten about the Hamill-Camel – that was the ultimate! I couldn’t do it back then, but maybe now … I can picture myself nailing it!
I absolutely love that you got up at 5AM to go do the thing you dreamed of. You had the persistence and vision. Definitely time for another girl-crush.
I feel so much fondness for that little girl in me who was so determined and persistent. It’s been fun thinking about me/her this week! I’m on the lookout for new girl crushes and I’m open to ideas!
I’m not the only one! Well, for me it wasn’t Dorothy Hamil (although I loved her hair too, could it be any cuter?) For me, it was Mark Spitz. I swam my little heart out, but only made it to the junior olympics. Looking back, it probably was less about the swimming and more about the speedos….
Mark Spitz was hot!! Good choice! I’m sooo impressed that you made it all the way to the Junior Olympics. I’m lucky I learned to skate backward! Thanks for commenting … I’d love to read a post about your swimming days.
Loved Dorothy Hamill!! Had the haircut, too! Great post!
Thank you! I’ll show my pic if you’ll show yours!! Unlike me, you probably had the perfect hair and facial structure for a Dorothy do!
What a sweet story of childhood perseverance! You told this so well. You could have picked much worse role models!
I think my choices of role models were better back then! Is that possible?
You were funny and sincere throughout, loved it! Dorothy was a bit before my time, but I remember people talking about her and seeing clips of her skating. This was a fun post!
I wish I could say Dorothy was a bit before my time too! Would you believe I was 10 weeks old when this story took place? Didn’t think so. Thanks for visiting!
Awesome, beautifully written post. I’m digging Dorothy’s ‘do.
Thank you! I wonder if I could pull of Dorothy’s do now that I have access to hair straighteners and de-frizzers? Nah, I’d probably still have a Q-tip resemblance.
I love the peek into your young mind that you gave us with this story.
Thank you! I just finished reading Birdman’s orgasm post on this week’s yeah write grid and my adult mind is a bit rattled. My young mind too!